The ad was for one of those TV shows in which people marry at first sight or marry someone just released from prison. A distraught woman was wailing, “I didn’t choose to have these feelings!”
She seemed to think she couldn’t behave in opposition to feelings. Though her feelings had started her in one direction, was there no way to backtrack? At the very least, she was obviously burdened by (and stuck in) her current feelings.
Of course we have feelings. We’re human! But we humans are self-centered, self-absorbed, selfish… And we’re perpetually encouraged to self-discover, self-validate, self-accept, self-actualize, etc. So our “selves”—driven by the feelings—are bound to take the driver’s seat. How can we be a bit more objective and intentional about what’s driving us?
Back in the 1990s, I regularly used a little exercise with the teen class. There were six cards, one with each of the following:
- if I
- think right
- and
- act right
- I will
- feel right
The six cards were scattered randomly on the table, and the teens were to put them in the correct order. The order should be as you see it above. But invariably, their impulse was to start with “if I feel right…” They would stop and consider, rearrange. But they didn’t automatically settle on “if I think right” as the first step.
Try the above exercise with a group of young people (or adults!). I may have gotten that idea from Josh McDowell, but don’t recall. Josh does have a helpful “4 Cs for Making Right Choices.” That “formula” echoes the pattern of the card exercise.
Scriptures related to right thinking:
- “We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10:5)
- “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)
- “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” (Colossians 3:2)
And the so-easy-to-memorize poem in this “Feeling, Fact, and Faith” article would be great to use/discuss along with all this.
